Once or twice a week, Alex and I have a conversation that goes something like this:

A1: Here is a feature idea.A2: I’m not sure about that.

A1: Here’s how it works.

A2: But what if the user doesn’t need that feature/doesn’t like that feature/isn’t comfortable using that feature/can do that without our site anyway/etc…

A1: Argument.

A2: Continue argument.

And by argument, I don’t mean like it’s heated or intense or anything, just that we’re trying to work through this. I think it’s incredibly useful, kind of like role-playing but without dice or leather (depending on what ‘roleplaying’ means to you.).

Sometimes, when browsing relatively new web sites, I wonder who’s been doing this and who hasn’t. Who actually walks through the experience that their web site creates? Who discovers that their core features are hard to get to, or that they have features that are stupid that nobody wants? Then, of course, you get into the question of the features that were thought of as stupid that became standard… Like seatbelts. But I digress.

I guess we need a checklist for Web features. Here’s how I imagine it:

1: Is this feature stupid?

2: No seriously, is this a stupid feature?

3: Look, stupid, maybe you are too stupid to know this is a stupid feature.

4: Okay now that we have that out of the way, is this already covered by a web site so popular that it isn’t worth competing with?

5: If not, is it at least covered by forty sites who are all trying to do the same thing?

6: Are you re-inventing the wheel by putting some kind of shiny gloss on an obvious feature that everyone is used to and doesn’t want to spend any more time dealing with than they have to? (3D Mailbox, I’m looking at you. Actually, I’m looking at those fake-CG-not-even-real-fake breasts in your promo video. Also, sumo asscrack.)

7: Is this a good feature on paper that is going to be a huge pain in the ass to implement and thus won’t ever work properly? (e.g. most of myspace up until recently)

8: Is this a good feature on paper that will be too complicated for anyone to use effectively?

9: If this is a mass-appeal feature, can stupid people use it?

10: Assuming this is a useful, well-planned, well-programmed, well-designed feature that stupid people can and will use because it is unique… is there any possible way to make money off of it?

11: If not, are there other features on your site that meet all criteria and CAN make money?

Rinse and repeat for every feature on your entire web site.